Sometimes, there’s a big difference between what your job responsibilities are on paper and what you actually do.

No one knows that better than cartoonist Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert. On his Dilbert Blog, he gave readers a creative assignment: “Describe your own job in one sentence, preferably in a humorously derogatory way.”

Although there were hundreds of responses, Adams was able to narrow them down to these ten job descriptions:

1. Fast food worker — Making food that is as healthy when it goes into someone’s body as it is when it comes back out.
2. Technical writer — Writing words that no one wants to read.
3. Assistant horse trainer — Cleaning up after an animal that makes more money than I do in a year.
4. IT director — Repeatedly fixing what employees repeatedly break.
5. Quality Assurance tester — Making people feel bad about their work.
6. Landscape photographer — Showing people how beautiful the Earth would be if they didn’t live on it.
7. Incident manager — Calling people who know what they’re doing — and then asking them what they’re doing.
8. College professor — Talking in other people’s sleep.
9. Baseball umpire — Standing on a field and getting yelled at for hours.
10. Divorce lawyer — Helping people hate one another.

Does summing up your job in one sentence make it sound different — or funny? Share your own descriptions in the comments section below.

Tags: Dilbert, Job descriptions, Office Humor